US for the Holidays - Part 1

As mid-December arrived, it was time to prepare for the holiday travel. It’s certainly not the best time of year to travel to the US but there are a number of reasons we do this. One is become I’m entitled to a trip home once per year (home leave) according to my work anniversary date. In my case, I began in December and I have the good fortune (or misfortune) of using this to spend time with family over the Christmas season. The second reason that it makes sense to travel at this time is because we can see a lot of family who have some time off work. In the US, notorious for affording employees a limited amount of time off, this is particularly important. Traveling to the US at another time of year would mean people would be working during the day and have less ability to spend time with us. A third reason, related to the previous one, is that we can see family and friends who are already gathering together. This requires us less travel to see all those we want to see (though there is still a considerable amount of driving to do). This one is becoming less important over time as family is less spread out than it used to be. My brother has lived in various parts of the US and is now back in Idaho. My sister was living in Taiwan for a while and now she’s back in Idaho. I seem to be the lone lost sheep, having been lost for quite some time now.

Maybe the biggest reason for me to travel to the US at this time of year is that I’m a huge fan of Christmas in Idaho. I love the cold, the snow, the traditions. I’ve lived on three different continents, in about a half dozen different countries, and I’ve only missed Christmas in Idaho once in my life. In spite of being considered the “rogue” member of a rather tight family, I’d say that’s a pretty strong commitment.  I also want my children to have that experience as well, in spite of the fact that they are growing up in Africa.

The downside of travel at this time of year is obvious. It’s more expensive. It’s crowded. The weather can impede travel. It’s much easier now that the kids are out of nappies and can watch the screen until they pass out. We’re pretty strict about screen time when we’re at home but when you’re on a long-haul flight, all bets are off. It’s the rare time we allow screen-binging. It makes it easier for everyone and given how infrequent it is, we don’t think it’s a big deal.

St. Paul

As is our custom, we flew through Amsterdam and then on to Minneapolis. We stopped in St. Paul to spend time with our friend Kathy. Always good to see her and also explore the area. I’ve grown attached to the Twin Cities and it’s always nice to just hang out there. If it weren’t for the fact that they have no mountains, I’d say it’s quite livable.

Southern Indiana

After a couple nights, we were off to Louisville. The backdrop of the travel this year was the declining health of Priya’s dad. In fact it’s been an issue for a couple years and each time we visit we haven’t been sure if we’d see him again. This time seemed a bit more acute given how things have been going.

We settled in to their house in southern Indiana. The girls are more than familiar with the place now and they jump right into their routines, digging out toys and picking where they left off the previous time we were there. The like to put on their rubber boots to go out and see if the chickens have laid any eggs. Throughout the holiday we look to take them on some sort of outing each day to keep them from going stir-crazy. This can take the form of Christmas shopping, going to a gymnastics facility, playing in a park (weather permitting), etc.

In the past Priya’s dad has perked up during the time that we were there. This was the first time that he seemed to be going in the opposite direction. It’s painful for everyone, first and foremost for him. Priya’s mom has been shouldering the caregiving from day one and you could see the strain on her as the days went by. We’d committed ourselves to helping out as much as possible. My inclination was to do as much of cleaning and grocery shopping as I could so that the others could focus on other things.

We did get him out of bed in an attempt to watch a football game together (featuring my alma mater) but were thwarted by the first weather-cancelled bowl game in history. What are the chances. We did sit and watch highlights for a while until we found out that the game would not be played. I think he’d had enough at that point, went to the loo and went back to bed. We were bummed but it wasn’t anything compared to those who were there. My niece and her husband (who works for the football program at the university) traveled to the game, went through all the pregame festivities and all that only to have the game end up being cancelled.

Other than Priya’s dad’s declining health, the holidays carried on more or less as normal. The weather was cold-ish but did not produce snow – i.e. no white Christmas. One important aspect to this particular visit was that it is likely to be the last one in their house. Plans have been in the works to move to a nearby town and thus sell the current house. It’s sad, to be honest, to leave what has been a very comfortable and functional home. But it just doesn’t make sense to live there anymore given the distance from healthcare and other services. It will be a big adjustment but there’s no question that it’s the right thing to do.

The new house will be much smaller but it will be brand new. Generally speaking I like the design and the location. The bedrooms will be too small but apparently the contractor wasn’t able to modify the floorplan. Not the end of the world and I think overall it’s going to work out well.

Our departure was more than sad. I don’t think the girls fully grasped the fact that they likely would not see their grandfather again. Priya, of course, did. I haven’t lost a parent and can only imagine how hard it was and would be over the coming days. As we left for Idaho, we were cognizant of the fact that her dad’s condition might worsen even further and she might need to come back. We discussed the various scenarios and packed accordingly. Good thing we did.